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Gamegus

Stupid Shit you did as a kid

107 posts in this topic

We all know that the mentality of kids can be absolutely retarded, you do something you think is fun or funny and 10 years later your facepalming over why the fuck you ever did it.

And I damn well know all of you have your stories... As do I considering I've had the most retarded moments out of any of you, probably hands down. So what's YOUR story?

List that shit.

During the 3rd Grade or so I brought this fake dynamite prop to school I bought at a Theatrical shop.

I was taken to the principles office and told them I wanted to show my friends and thought it looked more like a big firecracker then dynamite. He fuckin took my dynamite away D:<.

image004.jpg

Surely this looks like a firecracker rite? :0

Around 4th grade, during recess me and a friend of mine would roleplay going back in time *because we were fgts*.

Much like back to the future we needed a vehicle to transport us from timeline to timeline. So the only thing that resembled a vehicle was the see-saw, which then turned into a time traveling motorcycle.

Unfortunately, when two people are riding a see-saw in motorcycle fashion from afar, it looks like humping. ಠ_ಠ

So naturally a spectating teacher has enough of watching our buttsecks on the see-saw and we get confronted. To make matters worse I am busy riffling through my pockets picking out lint because I hate that shit, to the teacher this looked like fapping and I was immediately told to take my hands out of my pockets.

My parents are notified and lulz ensued.

During car rides, because of my childlike ADD nature I had to entertain myself. This brought on the invention of imagining a man or "insert fav TMNT character here" Hopping over street signs and cars. Or Skating over them.

Then as I progressed and started playing Doom and Wolfenstein, It evolved into enemies popping up out from behind things and me shooting them in a Maddog Mcgree American Lazer game fashion as we drove.

And lastly around 3rd or so grade I for some reason unknown, manipulated around 50% of my classmates during recess to think that *harvesting* dead grass from the playground and storing them in a bush like a warehouse was fun.

This behavior grew and lasted for a month or so, until some asshole kid that didn't like me, decided to steal our fucking dead grass from the warehouse bush and ran off to the edge of the soccer field and sat on them. Preventing us from getting them. Naturally a riot ensued and everyone was clambering to either get the dead grass back or stop the epic faggotry that was going on. After that debacle, harvesting the patches of dead grass was banned and the next day they had all the patches remaining on the grounds removed >:<.

The list goes on but I'm not posting anymore D:< .

Now it's all your fucking turns so we can have lulz at your expense :>

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During car rides, because of my childlike ADD nature I had to entertain myself. This brought on the invention of imagining a man or "insert fav TMNT character here" Hopping over street signs and cars. Or Skating over them.

Then as I progressed and started playing Doom and Wolfenstein, It evolved into enemies popping up out from behind things and me shooting them in a Maddog Mcgree American Lazer game fashion as we drove.

I did the same exact thing. Sometimes I would imagine a giant metal bulldog (I have no idea why) eating the road behind me. I was weird like that. Actually, sometimes I still imagine a dude skateboarding and grinding on all the signs and guardrails. I guess that makes me a tard.

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My brothers and I were jumping off our bunkbed onto pillows in our very early years, and then I jumped too far past the pillows and broke my foot.

Also my brother faked like he was going to hit me one time, and I acted like he did to get him in trouble, so I fell backwards and hit my head on a glass table and had to get stitches.

I also ran in front of my brother when he was taking a slapshot in our basement and got hit in my eyebrow, getting more stitches.

Another time my friend was riding a bike down the hill, and I just stood there in the sidewalk and he eventually ran into me very fast, hitting my shin to the bone and giving me more 21 more stitches.

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I did the same exact thing. Sometimes I would imagine a giant metal bulldog (I have no idea why) eating the road behind me. I was weird like that. Actually, sometimes I still imagine a dude skateboarding and grinding on all the signs and guardrails. I guess that makes me a tard.

Ya I did something similar, I'd imagine like a robot arm coming off the car and it would go over all the shit that got in it's way. Sounds pretty fucked up now that I think about it.

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When I was eight, I keyed my dads car with a nail or something. Carved my initials (duh) right into his '92 Fiero. Piece of junk anyway, but stupid nonetheless. I didn't even know I was doing something wrong!

Smeared my moms lipstick all over the inside of my moms car when i was five, too.

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I did the same exact thing. Sometimes I would imagine a giant metal bulldog (I have no idea why) eating the road behind me. I was weird like that. Actually, sometimes I still imagine a dude skateboarding and grinding on all the signs and guardrails. I guess that makes me a tard.

Yeah I did the same thing, I occasionally do it now as well, not often, but every now and then I'll imagine we gotta outrun a tornado behind us or something when I'm really bored, I lived an hour away from the nearest city so I had nothing else to do really. Sometimes when a good song was on, I would look at passing cars/buildings/ect and pretend each one has a note/line in the song and sung it as the car passed by it.

I also has something similar to the Dynamite incident, my dad bought me a grenade ((had been real but was a completely harmless dud now)) And me and my buds were throwing it back and fourth pretending to kill each other, so naturally someone saw this and we got called to the Office, not much happened, the Principle called my parents to make sure it was a real dud ((not like he could flip it upside down and check the HOLE inside of it, or the fact that he had been holding it this entire time with no pin in it, but this is a guy who ran himself over with his own tractor so I guess it comes with the territory)) and I got it back at the end of the day.

I did play pretend with my buds a lot, I forgot some of what happened, but what I do remember is that, we were playing some sort of pretend similar to like a "Terrorist attack situation" and at one point I pretended to eat the "plans of attack" and this other kid starting bawling because he hadn't finished pretend reading it, and we got called to the office, and I was a kid, so I couldn't explain to them that it was all fake so I got in trouble for eating pretend paper, gah!

Had a shower in the girls change room once.

Opened the car door when we were driving once and blamed it on the car, luckily the car was a piece of crap and we were gonna get rid of it eventually, but for my parents that was like the nail in the coffin so to speak, don't even remember what was wrong with it, but my parents say it was crap and that’s good enough for me!

I was playing hide and seek once and my friend’s sister used the car as a hiding spot once, which was off limits! GRRR! So after we were done that round I creped back to the car and locked the keys inside of it so nobody could get into it again! HAHAaaa didn't get in much trouble either.

Kicked a couple rocks off of a balcony onto a red car below, never got caught either.

Mixed a drink together that made all my friends but me barf, some even barfed reddish in color, it was like ((Ketchup,mustard,salt,pepper,coke,water,rootbeer,this yellow liquid not sure what it was, viniger,and a couple various pills ((not drugs, pills for health and what not)) Mmm mm good.

That’s all I got right now, probably think of a couple things later.

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I was working as a summer school assistant for preschoolers and it was our turn to go out to recess. We got a small game of dodgeball going and I accidentally threw one of the balls too hard and the kid fell flat on his back. He didn't cry, tho, which was cool. Fortunately I didn't get fired :o

Also, I had a copy of Echo the Dolphin for the Sega Genesis, with box, manual and everything and I sold it. I feel so stupid.

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I would go into the crawl-space under the house or something, dirty as fuck. I also pulled out he magnetic tape from my mom's cassettes.

What the fuck.

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When I was 4, for some reason, I had the urge to moon everybody in my family watching TV. I did it... like everyday and my sister would tell on me everytime.

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Damn this shit is hard to durge up...

I remember my one friend brought in bangers once, those strip one's in like yr5 (9/10 yrs old) and started setting them off. I got worried we'd get in trouble so i stood aside and kept watch. Of course some bitch walked up and said the usual "im gonna tell on youz!". But i dident get in trouble B)

I used to use my imagination to entertain myself on long car rides too, if there was good music on id imagine a film trailer to some film id make up.

My retarded friend (not anymore he's an asshole) laid down haribo once for my 4 yr old brother to follow and pick up, ended up falling over requiring stiches :angry:

The same friend shot one of my friends in the eye with a paintball when i brang round one of those blow powered paintball guns. He also used my spy camera to take pictures of his ass, so his parents confiscated the special film which meant the spycamera no longer worked.

I remember i was annoying my older brother so he got pissed and pushed my head into a bedpost giving my the biggest black eye ive ever had, when i was like 5.

When i was little i used to run around supermarkets pulling stuff off shelves, think i got banned from Tesco. Diden't mention that in my interview ;)

I remember when i was young i used to scream ALOT.

I remember i used to arrange games of Aliens, Half-Life and capture the flag with school jumpers :D

Might remember more later, Good times :)

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Stupid things I did as a kid?

One time a few friends and I were playing with matches and thought it would be a good idea to build a fire in a reed field, I can tell you. NOT a good idea, especially not in the summer.

I was throwing rocks at a wall (I was bored and that building wasn't really being used anymore) harder and harder but then I threw so uncontrolled I threw a rock through a window and ran.. never got caught. That building got borded up the next day.

When I was 6 or something I set fire to my pillow.

One time when I was 10 or something I liked spraying deoderant on the table and setting it on fire, quickly putting the fire out so the table wouldn't go up in flames. So after a few times it got boring so I quit but then I noticed a lot of heat under my chin, I accidently set my sweater on fire -_-.

Probably more things but I cant remember.

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I did the same car thing, only i had a stick-man, like a black and white stick-man, sometimes it would be the flash, but i did that almost every time i was in a car ride.

When i was a kid, i went to the pool a lot, so when i was there my cousin, who's a year younger then me, thought it a good idea to sit on my shoulders and almost drown me. So after i got him off i pushed him under water and almost drowned him doing the same thing. Afterwards he bitches about it to my mom and i almost get in trouble, i just said i didn't know he was drowning and didn't get in trouble for anything.

In 3th grade or somewhere around there, maybe lower, my teacher was talking to somebody so this girl in front of me was holding it for a long time, so she shit her pants. I thought it was hilarious and said some kind of pun or something thinking this was the best pun i had ever heard, figures that the teacher hears me say it. I get in trouble for cursing and making fun of the girl. - now that i think of it, it would have been better to say "shit happens"

but yeah

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When I was about 10 I broke my finger at Dick's sporting goods. I was pretending to get "the workout of my life" and I was swinging weights around. My right ring finger got caught between them and the tip got completely smashed. Blood was gushing everywhere.

After this occurred, I ran to my mom and said, "Mom, I'm bleeding."

I also remember the time when I was younger that I finally was bestowed the honor of responsibility. My parents told me to take out the trash. Being the masculine working man that I was, I proudly walked out of my house with the garbage in a pair of shorts and a wife beater. I even did that "macho" stretch where you flex your muscles.

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During my innocent childhood years I was at a friend's house and I'm in their garage with another friend that is maybe 3 or 4 years older. I notice a hatchet and I suddenly have a brainstorm.

I tell my friend that it would be a good idea that he chase this neighbor girl around the street with the hatchet and he agrees like a mindless puppet. >:>

He does the deed but unfortunately this gets around to my friend's dad that owned the hatchet and instead of being angry with the kid who did it he had a talk with me >:/.

Me and the kids in my neighborhood had these strange rituals of taking a room and trying to turn it into a haunted house like setting to scare the shit out of my younger cousin, or taking clothes and stuffing them with more clothes to make dead bodies and strew them around places. I don't remember why but it was fucking fun.

I use to make stop motion movies, the first few ones I made would be rather elaborate, but the more I made the less time I wanted to take making them move by themselves and all of a sudden it was just shots of the characters above their waste so you couldn't see me waving them around with my hand. And I would make up the story as I filmed so they were long drawn out boring ass videos.

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I used to get all the pillows in my house and put them all in the hallway then stack them up and wall up the hallway up to the ceiling. I did it while my mom was sleeping so the next morning she would wake up and there would be a wall in the hallway.

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I used to like to jump on things and crush them. This included glass. This proved to be a bad idea.

... several times... <.<

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When I was ten, I used to throw rocks at cars while hiding behind bushes.

When I was twelve, my dog jumped on top of me while I was teasing her with a milkbone. Smashed my head against the corner of a wall. Had to get stitches.

I once broke my arm playing Red Rover.

My friend stole a car and I was in the passenger seat. My friend was on a hallucinogen, I was drunk on tequila.

when I was like 9 I was playing an intense game of cops and robbers. I was surrounded in a portable potty. I then proceed to kick the door open, smashing the young child on the other side in the head. He fell down, blood was everywhere. I ran.

When I was 14, I got arrested with some friends for trying to convince this guy that we worked for a repo service. He called the cops.

I once slapped an exit sign in school, one of those ones that hang off the ceiling, it broke into pieces.

I burnt my eyebrow off with a sparkler when I was 8.

One of the first times I ever got high, I was to busy laughing to realize that my arm was positioned over a candle. My shirt set fire, nuff said.

I could tell you more, but nah.

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Injuries:

When i was 7 I broke my ankle after falling off a roof while perving on a girl.

Broke a finger while playing catch at a very young age. Tryed to catch the ball with a closed fist?

At like 12 i was in the year 7 inter-school sports team and hit a kid in the face with a javelin. I stopped doing javelin.

I grew up in a really bushy place, way out in the sticks, and we always had bon fires and i loved burning one end of a long stick so it was smoking and waving it around writing things in the air. My brother's eye was unfortunately positioned towards the end of the flaming stick.

I once kicked a kid in the back playing soccer cause he stole the ball of me. He satrted crying and i got in trouble. The next day I gave him my favourite pencil sharpener so we could be friends again. It was fucking cool; it was a pokie machine one with a handle and spinning numbers and everything.

Embarrassment:

I once played ill show you mine if you show me yours with a girl in year 5. She had pubic hair and i didnt. I was sad.

A girl pissed herself inclass onetime and it pooled all over the seat and the teach spilt it on his shoes when he was moving the chair. I lolled at him.

I got sent to the principals office for throwing marbles at peoples heads. I said thats how i though you played the game. I got away with it.

I once got in a fight at school and punched the kid in the face. He fell to the ground and started crying. So did i because i sprained my pinky in the process.

Pubescent day's:

I was chased by 3 police men in regards to a fight that had broken out at a party. I got away, but fuck me they are fast considering the shit they have to carry.

My bag was searched by police once and they checked every pocket except for the one that had the weed in it. I was so scared i almost started crying.

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At my school, I would throw rocks at the janitor and I never got caught. I'd throw rocks when she (lol, yea, it was an old lady) wasn't looking, or I'd just run.

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